Rotary E-mails

On or two times a month there's this other thing I do. I cook for the Rotary Club. Believe it or not, I'm one of the head chefs in my organization. (Sounds good doesn't it?)I belong to the Pittsfield Players, a community theatre group, and one of our fundraisers is to cater the Rotary Club dinners. The Players and The Women of Rotary are the only two non-profit organizations who take advantage of this opportunity every single month. Other non-profits have different times of year they want to raise a little extra money and sometimes the Rotarians cook for themselves.

My mother belongs to The Women of Rotary and both groups have this down to a science. It's just that one science is more basic Anatomy while the other is Bio-Chemistry. I'm saying that The Women of Rotary are probably a lot more organized. They probably meet at the end of the year to decide on the next YEAR, like who is cooking and what and when. My group doesn't. That's not to say we're not organized. We are. But you should see the emails.

Usually they start with, "who's cooking?" Who's the head chef? Who is deciding the menu? (This is an easy one) It's either me or Jon. I'm a 40-year-old part-time-stay-at-home-mom, part-time waitress, part-time transcriptionist/secretary, part-time cleaning lady and, of course, amateur actress. Of course.

Jon is a retired Reverend with a hell of a voice and a very sharp wit, an excellent cook, actor and stage manager. Yeah, we've got this down to a science: I send out an email to say what day we're cooking and what we're having. (Roast pork with mango salsa this time.) I ask Mike to make a salad and Geri to make bread. These are kind of their "jobs," their niches. Then I request two side dishes and a dessert. I tell them there's a sort of a theme and it's Mexican, with Cinco De Mayo coming up and all.

My group loves themes. "Mike, I want you to make a corn and black bean salad. Geri, you make corn bread or muffins, whichever you decide." Mike loves to make the salad. He loves when I tell him what to do. Mike is retired military, so is his wife, Nella but Nella doesn't get a say in this dinner because she will be ringing bells that night...Mike responds with, "I've looked up several recipes on the Internet but I'm not sure I can find iguana meat online...I'll keep looking."

Geri is a music director and I'm not sure what else because we only met four months ago and I've seen her four times. I do know she has gorgeous red hair and no electricity and a car that overheats. She also sends Hallmark e-cards for every occasion. Geri emails (from work) that she is going to coerce Carole to make the bread/muffins because Geri wants to make chili/chocolate cupcakes with butter cream frosting for dessert. I don't know what Carole does because I've never seen her at Rotary but her salad arrived with Geri once. I know that she's a great character actress with a cool voice.

Gay-Ann Chimes in. It's a very long chime.

She says that whenever we do a Mexican theme she always makes her taco salad but sometimes leaves off the Doritos because not everyone is a fan of Doritos and she never puts in meat because everyone's vegetarian nowadays but she sees that I asked Mike to make the salad and it's a black bean and corn salad and she doesn't think her banana split cake would make a very good Mexican themed dessert so she's really at a loss as to what to make because Mike's making the salad and she always makes her taco salad...without the Doritos.

I respond that one of their salads can be a side dish but they have to duke it out whose it's going to be. I also tell Mike that he can find iguana meat at Market Basket, duh. Mike stands his ground. Gay-Ann acquiesces in uncommon brevity and queries whether whether Mike is serious about the iguana meat. Gay-Ann is a part-time receptionist, a character actress and known in these parts as a 'theatre whore,' meaning she can be found almost every weekend in a theatre, ushering, attending or being in a show.

Jan doesn't respond to our emails. We always have to call to remind her but she always shows up. Jan is our costume mistress and drives a school bus for a living. I once dated one of her four sons and have known her forever. I can count on her to do the dishes.

In the meantime I find a recipe for cilantro rice cakes that might just fit the bill for the other side dish. Our menu is always; bread, salad, entree, two sides and dessert. Sometimes we remember to brew the coffee. But Nella usually brings the half and half and she'll be at bell rehearsal.

Mike emails telling me the Market Basket iguana is from Chili and everyone knows Chilean iguana is in mating season right now which makes for some very tough and cranky meat.

Gay-Ann is thoroughly confused.

Working with what you got

I sat down today, like I usually do on Sundays, to write out the 'menu' for the week, only difference being...I wasn't going grocery shopping this week... in this economy and with current gas prices I've become frugal to a fault, I throw nothing away and I'm really determined to use up the ingredients we have in the fridge, freezer and pantry....hmmm...frozen strawberries, leftover couscous, quick barley and ham, lots of leftover ham from Easter. Yeah, there's more and I'll get to that but I just wanted to give you an example of what I have to work with. Already our household have established "Meatless Monday" so we're doing a stir fry that I planned for last week when I did do grocery shopping. It will have baby corn, brown rice, frozen broccoli, water chestnuts, celery and homemade terryaki sauce sans the corn starch...and bread...not in the stir fry, beside it. I always add garlic toast as a filler. I know it's a bad habit, but I'm working on a budget here. Tuesday was supposed to be Taco Tuesday but I used the soft taco shells for quesadillas today. So we're doing mini-macaroni and cheeses...sans the cornstarch...really wish I'd bought that cornstarch now...and bread...and a side of broccoli. Why mini? (read: individual mac and cheeses) Because I only have half a box of pasta :). Wednesday my mother-in-law will have the kids so Joel and I can have leftover and ham and baked beans from the freezer that are soooooo good, even if I can't remember when I made them. (Note to self: get better about labeling stuff you shove in the freezer.) Thursday will be pizza. I have some frozen pizza dough and I'm looking in the fridge and I'm going to use that huge bag of mozzerella and a) sausage and cheese (leftover sausage) b) ham and cheese (the kids idea, actually...recognize the ham?) and, c) my favorite; asparagus and goat cheese - sounds decadent...wonder how long that goat cheese has been in there? Friday my mother-in-law will have the boys overnight because my husband and I are going to a show so we'll probably be eating ham and beans again or leftover asparagus and goat cheese pizza because the boys didn't sound thrilled about that. Saturday and Sunday will be either 'breakfast all day' or leftovers. I have so many "leftovers" that I'm not really sure where they all came from anymore. Any of you who had your eye on that couscous, don't worry I'll be having that for lunch someday this week, along with anything else I can find. And the frozen strawberries? (Do smoothies go with pizza?)