On or two times a month there's this other thing I do. I cook for the Rotary Club. Believe it or not, I'm one of the head chefs in my organization. (Sounds good doesn't it?)I belong to the Pittsfield Players, a community theatre group, and one of our fundraisers is to cater the Rotary Club dinners. The Players and The Women of Rotary are the only two non-profit organizations who take advantage of this opportunity every single month. Other non-profits have different times of year they want to raise a little extra money and sometimes the Rotarians cook for themselves.
My mother belongs to The Women of Rotary and both groups have this down to a science. It's just that one science is more basic Anatomy while the other is Bio-Chemistry. I'm saying that The Women of Rotary are probably a lot more organized. They probably meet at the end of the year to decide on the next YEAR, like who is cooking and what and when. My group doesn't. That's not to say we're not organized. We are. But you should see the emails.
Usually they start with, "who's cooking?" Who's the head chef? Who is deciding the menu? (This is an easy one) It's either me or Jon. I'm a 40-year-old part-time-stay-at-home-mom, part-time waitress, part-time transcriptionist/secretary, part-time cleaning lady and, of course, amateur actress. Of course.
Jon is a retired Reverend with a hell of a voice and a very sharp wit, an excellent cook, actor and stage manager. Yeah, we've got this down to a science: I send out an email to say what day we're cooking and what we're having. (Roast pork with mango salsa this time.) I ask Mike to make a salad and Geri to make bread. These are kind of their "jobs," their niches. Then I request two side dishes and a dessert. I tell them there's a sort of a theme and it's Mexican, with Cinco De Mayo coming up and all.
My group loves themes. "Mike, I want you to make a corn and black bean salad. Geri, you make corn bread or muffins, whichever you decide." Mike loves to make the salad. He loves when I tell him what to do. Mike is retired military, so is his wife, Nella but Nella doesn't get a say in this dinner because she will be ringing bells that night...Mike responds with, "I've looked up several recipes on the Internet but I'm not sure I can find iguana meat online...I'll keep looking."
Geri is a music director and I'm not sure what else because we only met four months ago and I've seen her four times. I do know she has gorgeous red hair and no electricity and a car that overheats. She also sends Hallmark e-cards for every occasion. Geri emails (from work) that she is going to coerce Carole to make the bread/muffins because Geri wants to make chili/chocolate cupcakes with butter cream frosting for dessert. I don't know what Carole does because I've never seen her at Rotary but her salad arrived with Geri once. I know that she's a great character actress with a cool voice.
Gay-Ann Chimes in. It's a very long chime.
She says that whenever we do a Mexican theme she always makes her taco salad but sometimes leaves off the Doritos because not everyone is a fan of Doritos and she never puts in meat because everyone's vegetarian nowadays but she sees that I asked Mike to make the salad and it's a black bean and corn salad and she doesn't think her banana split cake would make a very good Mexican themed dessert so she's really at a loss as to what to make because Mike's making the salad and she always makes her taco salad...without the Doritos.
I respond that one of their salads can be a side dish but they have to duke it out whose it's going to be. I also tell Mike that he can find iguana meat at Market Basket, duh. Mike stands his ground. Gay-Ann acquiesces in uncommon brevity and queries whether whether Mike is serious about the iguana meat. Gay-Ann is a part-time receptionist, a character actress and known in these parts as a 'theatre whore,' meaning she can be found almost every weekend in a theatre, ushering, attending or being in a show.
Jan doesn't respond to our emails. We always have to call to remind her but she always shows up. Jan is our costume mistress and drives a school bus for a living. I once dated one of her four sons and have known her forever. I can count on her to do the dishes.
In the meantime I find a recipe for cilantro rice cakes that might just fit the bill for the other side dish. Our menu is always; bread, salad, entree, two sides and dessert. Sometimes we remember to brew the coffee. But Nella usually brings the half and half and she'll be at bell rehearsal.
Mike emails telling me the Market Basket iguana is from Chili and everyone knows Chilean iguana is in mating season right now which makes for some very tough and cranky meat.
Gay-Ann is thoroughly confused.
No comments:
Post a Comment